Have you ever just stopped and said, "Now what?" "Now what?" about any part or all of your life, just "Now what?" What comes next? What's the next milestone? Where is life going to take me now? Life is going to take me somewhere...right?
In another time in my life, actually what seems like another life altogether, I wouldn't have even cared what was next...I would have just had my bags packed and ready. But now in my new life there has to be plans and steps or something guiding me in someway...I just feel lost somedays, like I am wandering in a very brightly lit hallway with lots of doors but no signs to tell me where they go...almost like a hospital with no exit signs...I am just aimlessly walking the halls, afraid to open doors because I might walk in on another patient. Nothing guiding me forward or showing me where I have been, just an empty hallway. And I feel trapped by this. I feel trapped because I feel like I HAVE to know where I am going and what my options are behind the doors. As if I need to be led, or scheduled.
Part of me yearns for the simpler more carefree days when it didn't matter what was ahead...nobody asking me what my plans were...I was just living. I was free to be me, whoever that was. Sometimes I don't feel like I even know that girl anymore...But I am sure she is here with me somewhere, hoping to be pulled to the forefront again...hoping for her chance at life again...I hate that I have forced that part of me to the shadows, to the dark corners of rooms left unopened in my head and heart for who knows how long. Keyed in by this person I have become that HAS to know what lies ahead...Who do I think I am to lock up the living part of who I am? The part of me that made me adventurous and carefree? The part of me who formed me into me.
I'm sick of it for her...I am taking charge of it...for her...and I am letting go of it all...for her. I am ready to live the life I was put here to live and she is going to be here to live it with me. Welcome back to the world Breezy Dawn.
Have a GOODloe Day!
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Fall Favorites..
I love the fall… the trees are changing, the air is cool, my electric bill is super low…I mean seriously low. This time of year is my favorite time of year. While I enjoy the summer because I like the outdoors, it’s often so flipping hot you can’t enjoy it a good deal of the time… and it’s better than spring because there isn’t as much wind and its coming up on winter which is a little too cold.
Fall is the start of the holiday season with family and friends making their rounds to all of the Thanksgiving spreads. And families lining up at Sears for Christmas photos for their greeting cards, and thre are of course the holiday sales…yippee!…I just love it all…People just seem happier this time of year. All good things!
Plus there is all the food! People cook more this time of year which is good for the eater in me… everything from grandma’s renowned cookies and fresh fudge to turkey and ham and green bean casserole…wow, my mouth just started watering. As much as I love the steaks and burgers and hot dogs of summer, there’s just something about a homemade pot pie or fresh made green chile chicken casserole straight from the oven that can just send me right into cool weather heaven. It’s like food just becomes more rich and savory when the weather gets cool…ok, I have to quit talking about food or I am going to have to quit writing and take a snack break. Chicken Alfredo, prime rib, dressing…now I’m done.
But seriously my favorite part of this season are the low electric bills… kidding, it’s the togetherness with the ones we care about. The sit down meals together, the football tailgates, the snuggling on the couch, the ski trips, the Christmas parties, the shopping and then going to Ruth’s for a burger, and just chatting about the day with the people you missed all day. The holidays just come once a year and are gone in a blink and for some they are the only time they get with their families. If you have no time to stop and smell the roses all year, you need to stop and smell the pine trees during this time of year…you won’t regret it.
The last day of fall is December 20th…so enjoy the season while it lasts…I know I will!
Have a GOODloe Day!
Fall is the start of the holiday season with family and friends making their rounds to all of the Thanksgiving spreads. And families lining up at Sears for Christmas photos for their greeting cards, and thre are of course the holiday sales…yippee!…I just love it all…People just seem happier this time of year. All good things!
Plus there is all the food! People cook more this time of year which is good for the eater in me… everything from grandma’s renowned cookies and fresh fudge to turkey and ham and green bean casserole…wow, my mouth just started watering. As much as I love the steaks and burgers and hot dogs of summer, there’s just something about a homemade pot pie or fresh made green chile chicken casserole straight from the oven that can just send me right into cool weather heaven. It’s like food just becomes more rich and savory when the weather gets cool…ok, I have to quit talking about food or I am going to have to quit writing and take a snack break. Chicken Alfredo, prime rib, dressing…now I’m done.
But seriously my favorite part of this season are the low electric bills… kidding, it’s the togetherness with the ones we care about. The sit down meals together, the football tailgates, the snuggling on the couch, the ski trips, the Christmas parties, the shopping and then going to Ruth’s for a burger, and just chatting about the day with the people you missed all day. The holidays just come once a year and are gone in a blink and for some they are the only time they get with their families. If you have no time to stop and smell the roses all year, you need to stop and smell the pine trees during this time of year…you won’t regret it.
The last day of fall is December 20th…so enjoy the season while it lasts…I know I will!
Have a GOODloe Day!
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